3 Reasons I Will Continue To Buy Environmental Toilet Paper

Even though my family hates me

Rebecca Cullen
Slackjaw
Published in
4 min readDec 17, 2021

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a Tim Burton style illustration of a house wrapped in toilet paper
illustration by Bravebirdie

I did not know your family could divorce you. My family’s lawyer, Larry, is citing intentional personal hygiene abuse and gross scatological negligence. I had to hire a lawyer, Phyllis, to explain what that even means.

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Rebecca Cullen
Slackjaw

L.A. woman. Subscribe to https://mojowriter.substack.com/ for one Medium tip, one SEO tip, 2 scoops of inspiration w. a cherry bomb of sass on top.